From: "Max B. Sawicky" <maxsaw at cpcug.org> Subject: Cyber Song Date: Mon, 19 Apr 1999 10:12:30 -0400
Courtesy of David McReynolds.
Pretty impressive rhyme and meter.
mbs
| THE MODERN CYBER-CITIZEN'S SONG. By Marcus Bales.
|
| I am the very model of a modern cyber-netizen
| All logic I dispense with, and all taste and manners jettison;
| I'm found on TV, radio, and many other "medias"
| But cyberspace is where I'm most particularly tedious.
| I come in every stripe from the conservative to radical
| And know it all except for how to spell or be grammatical.
| I haven't got a clue about the use of logicality
| And drivel on with made-up-factoid bargain-bin banality.
| I flame opponents hairless from a dozen different pseudonyms,
| Each one a ruder, lewder pun on Anglo-Saxon crudonyms,
| And where I find civility and hot debate have been at ease
| I break it up with spamming, flaming, scrolling and obscenities.
| I'm ignorant in every field, poetic to statistical,
| Which only makes my points of view more thoroughly sophistical;
| My attitude's aggressive and my tone is sanctimonious,
| My facts are bad, conclusions wrong, and arguments erroneous;
| My posts are pure unparagraphed expressions of my vanity,
| Impossible to parse except perhaps for the profanity.
| I'm known for disputatiousness and other sorts of knavery
| From purposeful mendacity to things yet more unsavory.
| The places civil reason is accounted most iniquitous
| Are places where you'll find me inescapably ubiquitous.
| In short, all logic I reject, all taste and manners jettison
| Because I am the model of a modern cyber-netizen!
>>