Hi,
As usual, lots of new fucks to report today. Also in today's newsletter is a free business plan for all of the investors and web developers out there. I say go with it.
If you're interested in advertising in the newsletter or on the site, let me know: pud at fuckedcompany.com
rock on, pud
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Some featured fucks:
Ooh, I want some Letsbuyit.com is still looking to go public -- the market says lets not. Basically these guys are trying to value a company at more the $500M that makes no money, burns about $8M a month, and only as about $13M left. Scam. Company: letsbuyit.com Points: 180
CEO resigns As previously seen on FC, b2bStores.com raised $35 million on its IPO and announced sales of only $6000. Yes, that is a six with three zeros. Well, their CEO just resigned. Lookin good for this future FC hall-o-famer..! Company: b2bStores.com Points: 194
MP3.com takes it 3 ways Karma Sutra style Universal, Sony, EMI Demand Maximum in Damages From MP3.com. Damages could reach a $81 billion. Company: MP3.com Points: 117
Other fucked companies today include: ebay.com drDrew.com globogear.com on2.com more on http://www.fuckedcompany.com
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For all you investors and web developers out there, I leave you today with a business plan, posted on the FC message board ( www.fuckedcompany.com/board ) by "netslave, CEO of StockWipe.com":
Synopsis: stockwipe.com is an e-commerce site where new Internet startups can go to order customizable legally binding stock option documents for employees printed on a variety of comfortable types of toilet tissue. These range from single to deluxe triple ply for especially valued employees.
A common complaint among internet workers has been "my stock options were straight up worthless after my dot-com failed". Now, with stockwipe.com that needn't be the case. Our R&D dept. is currently looking into ways to print stock options on a variety of other utilitarian items such as cigarette papers (for those who roll your own, wink, wink, nudge, nudge), napkins, and paper plates.
We are hiring! Sadly, we cannot offer actual pay at this time but each new hire will get 10,000 shares of stockwipe.com options printed on our best triple-ply. Benefits include: Use of a pool table I found behind my apartment one night, a half-empty bottle of Jack Daniels, and suicide assistance when it all gets too much for you. This includes free use of the company revolver (a nice Charter Arms .38) and one free bullet. If you miss, all subsequent bullets must be purchased from the company for $5.00/ea.
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