Vatican City - God ruled today against icon squatter Madonna Louise Veronica Ciccone (A.K.A. "Madonna") citing her with intentional misappropriation of the religious icon "The Madonna" for her blonde ambition and greed. She has been sentenced to an eternity of damnation upon her death.
"I have been watching her career for the past 20 years with scorn and disdain. I am normally a loving and forgiving Diety but I have just had it," said creator and omnipotent ruler of the universe. "She has broken the sabath, used my name in vain, commited adultery, even coveted Sandra Bernhard. I draw the line at Sandra Bernhard. She believes she can do what she wants? Well toots, I'm here and I'm pissed. "
Many Religious leaders are upset that the Lord Father Almighty failed to consult them prior to making the decision. "Oh my, what a wee bit of a pickle we have here." Said Father O'Hannagin of Our Lady of Eternal Forgiveness. "For so long I have seen these children with their rock-and-roll bang bang devil worshipping music making fun of our church. I think she's getting off easy. Send her straight to hell now, let the Devil have his fun with the little whore."
Still, many others are concerned how this might affect them. "Well, um, like. I used to like her and all but like her music isn't as good as the old stuff, like, ya know? And like, you can't dance to it either anymore ever since she started into that yoga stuff. Say, will I be able to get a refund on my tickets for her concert Friday?" said Mary-Beth Smithson of New Haven, CT.
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> [mailto:owner-lbo-talk at lists.panix.com]On Behalf Of Doug Henwood
> Sent: Monday, October 16, 2000 6:45 PM
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> important news on intellectual property...