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<i>The Philosopher's Drinking Song</i> <br>
<br>
Immanuel Kant was a real pissant<br>
who was very rarely stable.<br>
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar<br>
who could think you under the table.<br>
David Hume could out consume<br>
Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel,<br>
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine<br>
who was just as sloshed as Schlegel.<br>
<br>
There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach ya<br>
'bout the raisin' of the wrist.<br>
Socrates himself was permanently pissed.<br>
<br>
John Stewart Mill, of his own free will,<br>
after half a pint of shandy was particularly
ill.<br>
Plato, they say, could stick it away,<br>
'alf a crate of whiskey every day!<br>
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,<br>
and Hobbes was fond of his Dram.<br>
And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart:<br>
"I drink, therefore I am."<br>
<br>
Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed;<br>
A lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he's pissed.<br>
<br>
-- Monty Python<br>
<br>
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