Dangerous men...

[RE]

I think this is generally accepted among psychoanalysts, under such rubrics
as "projective identification" and "altruistic surrender" (wherein one
grants to others what one denies for oneself).  I'd add that this is a
process within intimate relationships by no means limited to women, men can
find aggressive women attractive for similar reasons.  For either sex at
times this may be because they can disown the aggression and then sorta
control it (projective identification), at other times it relieves them of
guilt about their own aggression.  What could be a liability becomes a
virtue, etc.  For both men and women, this can give a relationship a kind of
"healing"/integrative quality that is very powerful.  (I suspect that among
lefties this may be an unusually prevalent experience compared to the
general population, right?)
Randy


>
> Women, being culturally constructed into passivity, compensate by
> associating with aggressive/inconsiderate/wild men. As noted in (1) above,
> the wish is to experience aggression by proxy, and hence the attraction to
> that kind of male.  Perhaps there's also the expectation that dangerous
men
> are less repressed and therefore would make more passionate lovers, but
> that may be more of a personal non-sequitur.
If I'm right, it
> would also follow that women who are capable of self-assertion are less
> likely to be attracted to these kinds of men.
>
> Joanna
>
>