On our Max S. on Iraq and Florida

Gar Lipow lipowg at sprintmail.com
Thu Sep 12 14:15:26 PDT 2002


OK - Max is really, really funny today

http://maxspeak.org/gm/archives/00000479.html

It begins:

>EU DEBATES MEASURES TO RESTORE ORDER AND DEMOCRACY IN FLORIDA. [From Le Monde et La Merde, September 12, 2002] BRUXELLE -- The storied war cabinet of the European Union continued to meet today, deep in deliberations on restoring order to the rapidly deteriorating situation in Florida, U.S.A. Sources said debate bogged down initially over disagreements over whether order had actually prevailed in the first place.

>EU Minister of Information & Household Appliances Bo Husqvarnaquistholm from Sweden reported to the group on the present situation: "We have an across the board breakdown of the state's social and public services. The Child Welfare Department has been taken over by people who believe in flogging disobedient minors. Law enforcement agencies let perpetrators of drug offenses walk away from arrest. They prefer to focus on conducting surveillance on houses of prostitution. Election officials are ignorant of election laws. Election workers are ignorant of how to administer elections. Governor Jeb Bush is ignorant of the fact that elections are a state government responsibility. Dogs and cats have begun to try to eat each other, while alligators are eating them both. Janet Reno evades apprehension and is liable to eat anything."

>Minister of State Stability Sylvio Pecorino of Italy summed up the governance problem. "Legitimacy of the state has evaporated, given the debacle of the 2000 election, compounded by this week's repeat performance. The counties don't recognize the governor and the governor can't find the counties. We must act to bring self-government to the workers, peasants, and fisherpersons, both gay and straight. Regime change is imperative."



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