[lbo-talk] Penile Invasions (was: Dull)

Dwayne Monroe idoru345 at yahoo.com
Fri Aug 8 10:06:35 PDT 2003


Dennis Perrin wrote:

When considering the abject conditions of marital or extramarital sexual relations, one must keep in mind the political constraints which render said relations, if not moot, then, as Jeremy Calter noted in his extensive study of the economic aspects of the penis consensually entering the vagina...

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Okay, now this is funny stuff ladies and gentlemen.

Page After Page Press. Ha!

Sir, I would, were I wearing a hat, remove it with great flourish in your honor whilst performing the most gentlemanly of bows. Sadly, as I am hatless this gesture, which you couldn't see in any event, must go undone.

In lieu of that, I advise you to go to http://www.haypenny.com/ (the home of "concept fiction for concept people") and submit.

Even as we spin, like bathtub toys once the drain plug has been pulled, downwards towards some unknown abyss, there's still time for a dance with absurdity. Isn't there?

Now for a personal aside.

Many years ago, when I was young and full of flaming desire for daily drama, I dated an intensely bright young woman who fell in love with Andrea Dworkin's ideas.

We read Dworkin's works aloud to each other in bed and vowed to modify our relationship so that it would be scrubbed clean of all patriarchal behaviors.

So far so good.

But there were unforeseen complications arising from my beloved's interpretation of the Dworkin canon (or were they misinterpretations? - I'll never know). For example, we created an elaborate ritual for ensuring that sex was consensual - I won't go into details but if you imagine the two of us dressed in formal wear, sitting at a long table in Versailles reviewing a treaty you won't be too far off.

As I was the 'oppressor' needing to be retrained, this was obviously designed to contain me and not my lover.

But fair's fair no? And so, I insisted, when she initiated intimacy, that we go through the same process.

I know that men are supposed to jump without thought at any chance to get laid but my love of comedic absurdity and situational perversity would often win out and we'd find ourselves, antsy and bothered, back at the treaty table.

She was a passionate lass, who wanted what she wanted when she wanted it - and what she wanted, joyfully often, was a good romp. This negotiating was getting in the way big time.

It wasn't long before the Dworkin experiment fell into disrepair, then disarray, finally ceasing to function at all.

Our relationship retained a greater feel of democracy and equality - a good and lasting value - but the sexual part of life returned to the basics: desire with consideration of the other.

Such good times.

DRM

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