Having considered the evidence, I think all will agree that we are in a desperate state and that Russia owes us for its deceptive behavior. In closing, I propose Canada submit a call for Russian aid demanding the bare essentials: Pelmini, Kefir, canned cocktails, seven extra letters, and the world’s biggest anything. As well as teams of scholars to complicate our language, police to complicate our days, architects to make our subway trips a violent journey to the center of the earth, some straight men armed with twigs and vodka, a beauty school for our young women and a boot camp for our grannies.
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