[lbo-talk] take my life, please

R rhisiart at charter.net
Fri Sep 19 21:09:55 PDT 2003


----- Original Message -----

From: Kelley

To: Lame Brained Onanists

Sent: Friday, September 19, 2003 11:09 AM

Subject: [lbo-talk] take my life, please

hate to break it to MT, but just by going into this profession, some folks

would say he's regularly knee-deep in the most foul smelling sludge. :)

and he's writing about evidence that "accidentally" dropped into the garbage. he's a natural.

R

ya gotta read this. it's a hoot. didn't anyone tell this kid that a lengthy

cover letter was a bad idea?

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/mstoll1.html

SEPTEMBER 18--Matthew Toll is in his final year at the Tulane University

School of Law and, like many fellow students approaching graduation, is

seeking an associate's position paying at least $70,000 per year. The

25-year-old, though, has taken a unique approach to that hunt. Last month,

he sent 20-30 law firms his resume and a five-page interview request

drafted to resemble a legal filing (below you'll find the copy of Toll's

pitch letter that went to the New Jersey firm Wolff & Samson). Noting that,

"I am VERY hungry right now," Toll promised prospective employers that, "If

my mother's funeral was the day of a key deposition, I would do the eulogy

via teleconference after the deposition." And if his wedding was on the

date of a key trial, "the wedding would be postponed. If the wife to be did

not like it, I would inform her that work comes before EVERYTHING ELSE and

that if she does not like this, she is free to find a competing husband."

And, considering the tight job market, the kid is not afraid of getting his

hands dirty: "If a piece of evidence was accidentally dropped into the

garbage, I would have no problem going to the local dump and spending days

covered knee-deep in the worst foul-smelling sludge imaginable to search

for the evidence." When TSG caught up with him, Toll said he was not

embarrassed by the letter and had good relationships with his mother and

girlfriend, though Mom ribbed him, "So, you're not gonna come to my

funeral?" As word of his letter ricocheted through the legal community this

week, Toll began receiving phone messages and e-mails offering criticism

and job interviews. While Toll said the "vast majority" of the feedback has

been negative, "I don't care if everybody hates me, I only have to get one

job." (5 pages)

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