>In a series of posts that I otherwise agree with, John Thornton wrote:
>
> > Many people have children with little thought about how things are going to
> > be in reality.
>
>As irritated as I am with the moralism of the Gary?s of the world, I
>actually have just as big a problem with judging people (well, let's face
>it, women) for not availing themselves of abortion. People have kids mostly
>because they want to, and that's a great reason. I'm not sure people do very
>often have children without thinking about how it's going to be, and if they
>do, well, we should have the kind of society that can help them do a good
>job. Abortion is no more and no less "responsible" than having babies; the
>point is, women should be able to do either without censure.
>
>Liza
You have read something negative into my posts that simply isn't there. The fact is I have known several women who by their own admission had children without seriously considering the ramifications of that act. My own mother was one of those women. They volunteered that information and stated their regrets to me. I put no words in their mouths. If you have a problem with the fact that these and therefore in all likelihood more women feel that way you are just going to have to deal with it but don't demonize me for stating it. Perhaps you have greater insight into their decision making processes than these women themselves but I think that unlikely. I never claimed it was a majority or attempted to quantify a specific percentage of women who felt that way. There are a lot of women in the world. If even .2% felt that way it is a great many women. There is absolutely no judgement on my part to repeat the claim these women have made to me. If you want to doubt that they feel that way go ahead but I will assume they understand their own feelings and were able to articulate them to me. There is nothing I can see in my posts that suggests that I believe making one choice over the other is more or less responsible. Some women have had an abortion that they regret many others are glad they made that choice. Some women have chosen to have children and some regret making that choice. Making this claim is not making a judgement on my part and I do resent your implying that I have made some sort of negative judgement about women for "not availing themselves of abortion" as you put it. You are quite simply wrong in your assessment of my posts on this matter. Many people do a great many things with little thought of how things are going to be in reality. That is just part of being human. I doubt you would find a great number of people who would claim they have never done so. Our society encourages people to have unrealistic expectations in most aspects of our lives. If you doubt that any women have ever had a child without thinking through the reality of that decision then you seem to be claiming that women having children are somehow exempt from the imperfections of human behavior where procreation is concerned. I find that highly unlikely. As far as having the type of society where people help each other out and offer support to each other to make decisions that work for them I couldn't agree more. I can't imagine what I would have ever posted that would lead one to believe I would oppose such a thing.
John Thornton