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Helping Boys Become Men, and Girls Become Women
Is My Child Becoming Homosexual?
Before puberty, children aren’t normally heterosexual or homosexual. They’re definitely gender conscious. But young children are not sexual beings yet — unless something sexual in nature has interrupted their developmental phases.
Still, it’s not uncommon for children to experience gender confusion during the elementary school years. Dr. Joseph Nicolosi reports, “In one study of 60 effeminate boys ages 4 to 11, 98 percent of them engaged in cross-dressing, and 83 percent said they wished they had been born a girl.”
Evidences of gender confusion or doubt in boys ages 5 to 11 may include:
1. A strong feeling that they are “different” from other boys.
2. A tendency to cry easily, be less athletic, and dislike the roughhousing that other boys enjoy.
3. A persistent preference to play female roles in make-believe play.
4. A strong preference to spend time in the company of girls and participate in their games and other pastimes.
5. A susceptibility to be bullied by other boys, who may tease them unmercifully and call them “queer,” “fag” and “gay.”
6. A tendency to walk, talk, dress and even “think” effeminately.
7. A repeatedly stated desire to be — or insistence that he is — a girl.
If your child is experiencing several signs of gender confusion, professional help is available. It’s best to seek that help before your child reaches puberty.
“By the time the adolescent hormones kick in during early adolescence, a full-blown gender identity crisis threatens to overwhelm the teenager,” warns psychologist Dr. James Dobson. To compound the problem, many of these teens experience “great waves of guilt accompanied by secret fears of divine retribution.”
If your child has already reached puberty, change is difficult, but it’s not too late.
And also:
http://www.focusonyourchild.com/develop/art1/A0000690.html
If Your Child Needs Help
If your child exhibits repeated overt prehomosexual tendencies:
1. Accept your child and affirm his or her worth regardless of the characteristics you observe. Show unconditional love.
2. Don’t wait until your daughter’s masculinized behavior or your son’s effeminate preferences get any worse. Remember that for many prehomosexual boys and girls, some of the characteristics may be more subtle:
* inability to bond with same-sex peers
* feeling different from and inferior to other same-sex peers
* discomfort with his or her gender
3. Call to make an appointment with a professional therapist who believes change is possible. Work patiently with that therapist in redirecting your child’s prehomosexual behaviors. To find a qualified therapist, contact one of these organizations:
Exodus International P.O. Box 540199, Orlando, FL 32854 Phone: 407-599-6872 or 888-264-0877 (toll-free) Fax: 407-599-0011
National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality 16633 Ventura Blvd., Suite 1340 Encino, CA 91436 Phone: 818-789-4440