[lbo-talk] "Helping Boys Become Men, and Girls Become Women"

[B.]

Focus on the Family:

http://www.focusonyourchild.com/develop/art1/A0000684.html

Helping Boys Become Men, and Girls Become Women

Is My Child Becoming Homosexual?

Before puberty, children aren’t normally heterosexual
or homosexual. They’re definitely gender conscious.
But young children are not sexual beings yet — unless
something sexual in nature has interrupted their
developmental phases.

Still, it’s not uncommon for children to experience
gender confusion during the elementary school years.
Dr. Joseph Nicolosi reports, “In one study of 60
effeminate boys ages 4 to 11, 98 percent of them
engaged in cross-dressing, and 83 percent said they
wished they had been born a girl.”

Evidences of gender confusion or doubt in boys ages 5
to 11 may include:

1. A strong feeling that they are “different” from
other boys.

2. A tendency to cry easily, be less athletic, and
dislike the roughhousing that other boys enjoy.

3. A persistent preference to play female roles in
make-believe play.

4. A strong preference to spend time in the company of
girls and participate in their games and other
pastimes.

5. A susceptibility to be bullied by other boys, who
may tease them unmercifully and call them “queer,”
“fag” and “gay.”

6. A tendency to walk, talk, dress and even “think”
effeminately.

7. A repeatedly stated desire to be — or insistence
that he is — a girl.

If your child is experiencing several signs of gender
confusion, professional help is available. It’s best
to seek that help before your child reaches puberty.

“By the time the adolescent hormones kick in during
early adolescence, a full-blown gender identity crisis
threatens to overwhelm the teenager,” warns
psychologist Dr. James Dobson. To compound the
problem, many of these teens experience “great waves
of guilt accompanied by secret fears of divine
retribution.”

If your child has already reached puberty, change is
difficult, but it’s not too late.

And also:

http://www.focusonyourchild.com/develop/art1/A0000690.html

If Your Child Needs Help

If your child exhibits repeated overt prehomosexual
tendencies:

1. Accept your child and affirm his or her worth
regardless of the characteristics you observe. Show
unconditional love.

2. Don’t wait until your daughter’s masculinized
behavior or your son’s effeminate preferences get any
worse. Remember that for many prehomosexual boys and
girls, some of the characteristics may be more subtle:

    * inability to bond with same-sex peers
    * feeling different from and inferior to other
same-sex peers
    * discomfort with his or her gender 

3. Call to make an appointment with a professional
therapist who believes change is possible. Work
patiently with that therapist in redirecting your
child’s prehomosexual behaviors. To find a qualified
therapist, contact one of these organizations:

Exodus International
P.O. Box 540199, Orlando, FL 32854
Phone: 407-599-6872 or 888-264-0877 (toll-free)
Fax: 407-599-0011

National Association for Research and Therapy of
Homosexuality
16633 Ventura Blvd., Suite 1340
Encino, CA 91436
Phone: 818-789-4440