[lbo-talk] stiffupperlippery

Daniel Davies d_squared_2002 at yahoo.co.uk
Thu Jul 14 23:31:17 PDT 2005


I am heartily sick of all this spirit of the Blitz stuff. I profoundly regret having contributed to it in some small way by posting the lyric to "London Pride" by Noel Coward on my weblog. By way of recompense and since Carl and James' conversation has turned to The Master, I reproduce one of his finer songs below, which demonstrates what he actually thought of all this terrible bollocks.

dd

They're out of sorts in Sunderland And terribly cross in Kent, They're dull in Hull And the Isle of Mull Is seething with discontent, They're nervous in Northumberland And Devon is down the drain, They're filled with wrath On the firth of Forth And sullen on Salisbury Plain, In Dublin they're depressed, lads, Maybe because they're Celts For Drake is going West, lads, And so is everyone else. Hurray-hurray-hurray! Misery's here to stay.

Refrain 1

There are bad times just around the corner, There are dark clouds hurtling through the sky And it's no good whining About a silver lining For we know from experience that they won't roll by, With a scowl and a frown We'll keep our peckers down And prepare for depression and doom and dread, We're going to unpack our troubles from our old kit bag And wait until we drop down dead.

Verse 2


>From Portland Bill to Scarborough
They're querulous and subdued And Shropshire lads Have behaved like cads
>From Berwick-on-Tweed to Bude,
They're mad at Market Harborough And livid at Leigh-on-Sea, In Tunbridge Wells You can hear the yells Of woe-begone bourgeoisie. We all get bitched about, lads, Whoever our vote elects, We know we're up the spout, lads. And that's what England expects. Hurray-hurray-hurray! Trouble is on the way.

Refrain 2

There are bad times just around the corner, The horizon's gloomy as can be, There are black birds over The grayish cliffs of Dover And the rats are preparing to leave the B.B.C. We're an unhappy breed And very bored indeed When reminded of something that Nelson said. While the press and the politicians nag nag nag We'll wait until we drop down dead.

Verse 3


>From Colwyn Bay to Kettering
They're sobbing themselves to sleep, The shrieks and wails In the Yorkshire dales Have even depressed the sheep. In rather vulgar lettering A very disgruntled group Have posted bills On the Cotswold Hills To prove that we're in the soup. While begging Kipling's pardon There's one thing we know for sure If England is a garden We ought to have more manure. Hurray-hurray-hurray! Suffering and dismay.

Refrain 3

There are bad times just around the corner And the outlook's absolutely vile, There are Home Fires smoking
>From Windermere to Woking
And we're not going to tighten our belts and smile, smile, smile, At the sound of a shot We'd just as soon as not Take a hot water bottle and go to bed, We're going to untense our muscles till they sag sag sag And wait until we drop down dead.

Refrain 4

There are bad times just around the corner, We can all look forward to despair, It's as clear as crystal
>From Bridlington to Bristol
That we can't save democracy and we don't much care If the Reds and the Pinks Believe that England stinks And that world revolution is bound to spread, We'd better all learn the lyrics of the old 'Red Flag' And wait until we drop down dead. A likely story Land of Hope and Glory, Wait until we drop down dead.

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