Angered that the French people voted down the European Union's constitution two weeks ago, French President Jacques Chirac announced today that he agreed with President Bush that the French suck.
For the French president, the public acknowledgment that the French suck marked a reversal of his position and a stunning break with centuries-old tradition.
Mr. Chirac took the extraordinary step of flying to Washington to appear side-by-side with U.S. president to express their mutual distaste for the French.
In a Rose Garden ceremony, the French president told reporters, "For years, President Bush has been complaining about the French, and now, Sacre Bleu! I know what he's talking about," adding, "They are annoying."
In a joint communiqué, the two leaders said they would work together to ridicule the French people, with Mr. Chirac agreeing to import over one thousand anti-French jokes over the next twelve months.
In addition, the French president said he would propose legislation in France that would change the words "pommes frites" on all French restaurant menus to "Freedom Fries."
"Wait til those cheese-eating surrender-monkeys get a load of that!" Mr. Chirac said.
For President Bush, the French president's agreement that the French suck was sweet vindication, but Mr. Bush indicated that he was not about to rest on his laurels.
"I will not be satisfied until Gerhard Schröder admits that the Germans suck," Mr. Bush said.
Elsewhere, a new study shows that teenagers who watch TV shows with sexual content are more likely to have sex, while teenagers who watch "CSI" are more likely to solve crimes. -- Jim Devine "Segui il tuo corso, e lascia dir le genti." (Go your own way and let people talk.) -- Karl, paraphrasing Dante.