sex, guns, and girls

kelley kwalker2 at
Mon Aug 14 07:42:49 PDT 2000

let's say that what we should get rid of or try to get rid of (and i would say is possible to get rid of, though not easy and certainly bound up with an attempt to get rid of exploitation and capitalist oppression) is gender oppression. gender may well be here to stay since i personally don't think we need to raise androgynous beings in order eradicate gender oppression. *sigh* old fashioned, modernist phrase, i know.

so what i would like would be a world where, for example,

i won't be told by a prof after class that i'm pretty aggressive

i won't watch a roomful of unemployed upper level managers tell the lone woman among them that, "of course there is discrimination against women".

i also won't have to here her, over and over again, preface her question, "do you think i'm facing discrimination here" by telling every one it wasn't her idea but her husband's and, moreoever, tell them all several times that she's not a feminist and just doesn't believe women are discriminated against.

nor will i have to listen to guffaws in the room when one of those unemployed managers discusses what he'll do if he doesn't find work: should he work for peanuts at the 7-11, to bring in some money, he wonders No way! he says. I'll make my wife do it first.

i don't get told by my dept chair that working class girls like me and the secretary are cooler than the middle class broads he has to deal with. those women are so p.c. and uptight, but me and office secy, we're different and like to hear dirty jokes.

i won't listen to the payroll manager tell me that she's noticed that women running same units, doing same level of activity and making similar profits are getting systematically paid less than men.

i won't hear from a female prof that she's annoyed that i have to leave class early b/c of a school function for my kid

i won't get the phone call from school informing me that child is sick when i work 50 m from home, while the emergency number paper work includes kid's father's address and phone and it's clear that he works five miles from school. when asked why they didn't call him, they reply: "but your his mother and a sick child needs his mother."

i won't have learned to expect that each and every interview i go to, i will be asked, in some way, what my marital and family status is. nor will i feel that there won't be much i can do about it.

i won't have students feels that it's a-ok to come up to me and drape their arm around me and flirt it up to see if they can schmooze me into leniency. <nor will i have to forestall crits from male profs on list who will tell me girls flirt with them too, by pointing out that girls probably don't physically touch them when doing so>

i won't have to sit in an interview with three men from administration, one who drapes his arm around loveseat we're sitting on and other who, a short guy, seems to have trouble making eye contact. not that i'm any great shakes mind you, but we're talking uni administrators and they're hard up, as we all know</sarcasm>

the above joke won't be so funny

i won't feel it necessary to make above joke in order to suggest that i'm ordinary looking lest anyone on the list think it's a come on or think i'm bragging in a way unbecoming to my fair sex

that i can engage in talk of sex and sexuality because it's a field of intellectual specialization and not have it assumed by a few that this is all kelley ever talks about when this isn't objectively true and even if it were, it wouldn't be necessarily thought a bad thing

that a few dicks on the list won't take what i say as an invite to send me lewd comments or links to x-rated sites <these things are true, those ppl aren't on list anymore so it's no one here.> moreover, i won't feel that i can't cuss those dicks out because that might encourage them to get angrier and go off deep end. <recall, here, doyle's behavior when i told him to knock of the undue obsession with my posts>

i won't feel it necessary to say, "hey guys, it's ok. i'm not an uptight bitch and i like to flirt and i think you, each and everyone of you, are cool dudes, so don't take this personally and don't think i'm one of those bitchy feminists."

just thought i'd engage in rant, too, rob. alas, mine isn't likely nearly as hilarious as yours.


At 11:24 PM 8/14/00 +1000, Rob Schaap wrote:
>G'day Peter,
> >This doesn't make sense, Rob. We don't allocate meaning to differences in
> >eye colour.
>Well perhaps we look at eye colour for different reasons. Back in my
>fraught days on the market, it was a good idea, for instance, to check a
>new girlfriend's eye colour straight away, as it was almost inevitable she
>would one day turn away abruptly, and demand to know what colour her eyes
>were. If you were unable to answer, your love was apparently not genuine,
>necessitating a drawn-out self-redemption ritual. Of course, all the real
>rakes were onto this way ahead of the rest of us, and I trust I speak of a
>distant past.

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