internet hoaxes

Michael Pugliese debsian at pacbell.net
Fri Mar 17 21:40:08 PST 2000


I wish I knew who wrote this, it's the definitive answer to all those gullible fools that circulate internet hoaxes and urban legends. thank gawd, no one on this list has ever forwarded any of these. If i could only say the same of other venues.

Michael Pugliese

01. Big companies don't do business via chain letters. Bill

Gates is not giving you $1000, and Disney is not giving

you a free vacation. There is no baby food company issuing

class-action checks. Proctor and Gamble is not part of a

satanic cult or scheme, and its logo is not satanic. MTV

will not give you backstage passes if you forward something

to the most people. The Gap is not giving away free

clothes. You can relax; there is no need to pass it on

"just in case it's true."

02. There is no kidney theft ring in New Orleans. No one is

waking up in a bathtub full of ice, even if a friend of a

friend swears it happened to their cousin. If you are

hell-bent on believing the kidney-theft ring stories, see:

<http://urbanlegends.tqn.com/library/weekly/aa062997.htm>

And I quote: "The National Kidney Foundation has repeatedly

issued requests for actual victims of organ thieves to come

forward and tell their stories." None have.

That's "none" as in "zero." Not even your friend's cousin.

03. Neiman Marcus doesn't really sell a $200 cookie recipe.

And even if they do, we all have it. And even if you don't,

you can get a copy at:

<http://www.bl.net/forwards/cookie.html>

Then, if you make the recipe, decide the cookies are that

awesome, feel free to pass the recipe on.

04. If the latest NASA rocket disaster(s) DID contain

plutonium that went to particulate over the eastern

seaboard, do you REALLY think this information would reach

the public via an AOL chain letter?

05. There is no "Good Times" virus. In fact, you should

never, ever, ever forward any email containing any virus

warning unless you first confirm that an actual site of an

actual company that actually deals with viruses.Try:

<http://www.norton.com>

And even then, don't forward it. We don't care.

And you cannot get a virus from a flashing IM or email, you

have to download it....ya know, like, a FILE!

06. There is no gang initiation plot to murder any motorist

who flashes headlights at another car driving at night

without lights.

07. If you're using Outlook, IE, or Netscape to write email,

turn off the "HTML encoding." Those of us on Unix shells

can't read it, and don't care enough to save the attachment

and then view it with a web browser since you're probably

forwarding us a copy of the Neiman Marcus Cookie Recipe

anyway.

08. If you still absolutely MUST forward that

10th-generation message from a friend, at least have the

decency to trim

the eight miles of headers showing everyone else who's

received it over the last 6 months. It sure wouldn't hurt

to get rid of all the ">>>" that begin each line either.

Besides, if it has gone around that many times we've

probably already seen it.

09. Craig Shergold (or Sherwood, or Sherman, etc) in England

is not dying of cancer or anything else at this time and

would like everyone to stop sending him their business

cards. He apparently is no longer a "little boy" either.

10. The "Make a Wish" foundation is a real organization

doing fine work, but they have had to establish a special

toll free hot line in response to the large number of

Internet hoaxes using their good name and reputation. It is

distracting them from the important work they do.

11. If you are one of those insufferable idiots who

forwards anything that "promises" something bad will happen

if you "don't,"-- then something bad will happen to you if I ever

meet you in a dark alley.

12. Women really are suffering in Afghanistan, but

forwarding an e-mail won't help their cause in the least.

If you want to help, contact your local legislative

representative, or get in touch with Amnesty International

or the Red Cross.

13. As a general rule, e-mail "signatures" are easily faked

and mean nothing to anyone with any power to do anything

about whatever the competition is complaining about.

14. KFC really does use real Chickens with feathers and

beaks and feet. No, they really do. Why did they change

their name? In this health conscious world, what was KFC's

name? Kentucky FRIED Chicken. FRIED is not healthy. So with

the help of a focus group, they changed the name to KFC.

It's short, doesn't offend dieters and it's easy to remember.

15. Another thing, just because someone said in a message,

four generations back, that "we checked it out and it's

legit," does not actually make it true.

PS: There is no bill pending before Congress

that will allow long distance companies to charge you for

using the Internet.

Bottom Line... composing e-mail or posting something on the

Net is as easy as writing on the walls of a public

restroom.

Don't automatically believe it until it's proven false...

ASSUME it's false, unless there is proof that it's true.

Now forward this to everyone you know or the program I just put on your hard drive while you read this E-mail will open up your CD-ROM and reach out and slap you upside the head!



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