This is certainly the last time I mention my sex life on an e-mail discussion list. (I would also like to avoid giving my girlfriend, who is one of the coolest people on the face of the earth, any sort of international e-mail reputation for better or worse.)
PS. If I didn't care about or respect her desires, I wouldn't be dating her. Kindly don't besmirch either me or her, neither of whom you have ever met.
Chris Doss The Russia Journal
---------- chris's comment was a form of sexism that contributes to the constellation of habits, practices, and norms that lead to rape in this country. we usually call this social dynamic "oppression".
chris's comment seems normal. and, of course, when his comment was challenged, the objection was ridiculed, as you do below.
chris judges a girl "slow" because she does not meet his desire for sex. however, there is no _objective_ gauge against which one can measure his girlfriend's "speed". the only gauge is chris's desire. compared to him, she's "slow". her speed is problematized, while chris's is not. she is "slow" whereas chris is "normal". he is the gauage against which she is measured, except a realization of that is erased (hidden) by the very taken-for-grantedness of his discourse.
but imagine that chris had said that he was "fast".he could have. there is no reason not to. however, chris judges his girlfriend slow, instead of himself as fast. nowhere in any of it, is an interest in what her desires are. her desires are erased, his become normal.