in other words, people get really offended if, for example, someone flirts with another woman in public. i and another woman were almost beat up once for this. we merely flirted while playing pool. i resent jerks like andrew sullivan because they put my fucking life at risk, as well as the lives of people i love. in that same bar, a friend who wasn't gay at all almost got beat up because he "looked" gay.
i have a friend, a prof at a uni. her partner went to the library to get a library card. she asked, "which route should i take? i'm the partner of a woman who works at the uni, but i'm also a daughter of an alum. which card privileges are better?" the guy at the library desk flipped out and said that she was flaunting her homosexuality in his face.
andrew sullivan's public moralizing about how gays behave and flaunt their sexuality contributes to this kind of nonsense. it encourages wild ass speculations about gay male sexuality so that people think that the mere presence of a gay man or someone who "looks" gay is threatening, so much so that they must be aggressively driven away, mocked, ridiculed, etc.
also, while i don't agree with what people did to him (i think it petty), i also say, "whathefuckever. the guy put his sexuality out there and he condemned others for not living like him. i agree with my bud joe - a LOT. i hate both signorelli and sullivan. they're assholes.
i don't actively support this kind of attack, but i'm sure not going to get on nathan's high horse and get all offended about it. no one really knows how anyone found out about it all.
additionally, and this is strictly my position here and has nothing to do with sullivan or his hypocrisy, i don't understand the defense of barebacking at all. maybe i'm wrong, but i thought barebacking was ALL about seeking out HIV+ so that one can expose themselves to AIDS. i happen to think that it isn't a good idea to encourage sexual practices that exist only because HIV exists! barebacking is _only_ an issue because of HIV. it didn't matter before!
but more importantly, this is pretty consistent with my attitudes toward public health --and health is a public fucking issue, not a personal one--it's not clear to me that we should encourage or support people who engage in sex or any practice just so that they can get a communicable disease or, indeed, any disease.
i wouldn't encourage people to do anything else that might mean they'd get a disease, communicable or not! if the guy taking the risk with andrew isn't honest with andrew about his HIV- status, do you really think he's going to be honest with anyone else?
barebacking between HIV+s is fine, but i got the impression that Sullivan advertised at a site specifically FOR men who have a fetish--a desire to expose themselves to HIV. as i said, he could have advertised in many other places specifically targeted TO people who are HIV+. sure, that wouldn't eliminate the problem altogether, but....
and, at any rate, i'm not charging him with hypocrisy since i thought sullivan was the one going around tell everyone to ditch their condoms anyway?
kelley