|| -----Original Message-----
|| From: joanna bujes (...)
|| How could it be that
|| making love to a
|| woman can have this effect (when I am not even hard-wired for
|| it) and how
|| could men experience this ....and continue to treat women the
|| way they do?
|| How could a man experience this and still continue to think and
|| act like a
|| boy? How could a man prefer the experience of woman as passive
|| object to
|| this? How could power make up for this? (...)
|| (Thank you Hakki and Chuck G. for the support.)
Thanks for bringing this up. The answer to your questions lies in the false assumption that men and women are "hard wired" for mutual sexual bliss. The only hard wiring is for procreation. The pleasure part is just the honey-trap and it's only as good as it needs to be to achieve the desired end. Let me generalize a bit: It's a fact that womens' sexual pleasure is far more intense, total, and enduring than mens' is. This huge rush makes a woman much more energetic and active in lovemaking than a far more fit and athletic man. Women have to restrain themselves in order not to scare their partners into flaccidity. Men, OTOH, rarely enjoy a lasting pleasure and tension that would make protracted lovemaking worthwhile. Their pleasure is brief, so they have a tendency to go for it instead of waiting for their partner. So heterosexual lovemaking is really a compromise at best. Stuff I've read about Inuits, Bantus, and Trobianders suggests this ain't necesarily so for pre-industrial cultures, but the difference isn't purely cultural and has to with environmental factors such as endocrine disruptors as well (sperm counts falling and all that). Also, widespread use of viagra and similar drugs may change the picture.
Anyway, the pleasure imbalance is something men and women should recognize and deal with, instead of calling each other names.
Hakki