> the most obsequious essay. those five will be awarded As automatically if
> they make sure to bring me my coffee every day.
And in a special gold-plated cappucino cup of wrought ivory on a velvet cushion (actually, a cheap Chinese import with Dayglo paint, but they don't need to know that). You can't beat the theatrical effect of working yourself up into a metaphysical rage and smashing the thing against the floor now and then. You have to make them cower before your implied wealth -- kind of like how Microsofties buy up useless sports teams or money-losing cable ventures, the expenditure *is* the ideology.
If worst comes to worst, just issue junk bonds and require your serfs -- I mean, students -- to invest their life savings in your own private cash-generating corporate educational consultancy (of which you are the sole proprietor, owner and CEO). The magic of the marketplace knows no bounds!
-- Dennis