John O'Farrell Saturday March 30, 2002 The Guardian
Twenty years ago this week the news came through that Argentina had invaded the Falkland Islands. Details were sketchy in those first few hours, though some people thought the islands might be in the Indian Ocean, or perhaps near Australia.
While the Foreign Office were still leafing through their big dusty atlas with the British Empire bits coloured in pink, Margaret Thatcher had already decided to go to war. Almost overnight she went from being a vulnerable and deeply unpopular prime minister to being an unassailable politician who was in a position to do to British industry what she'd just done to the Belgrano. A fascist dictatorship was toppled in Argentina, but, apart from that, everything went the way she wanted it.
Now, in the same way, George Bush has been turned from discredited leader to popular national hero by embarking upon military action overseas. They are rewriting the lyrics to Edwin Starr's classic peace anthem. Now it goes: "War! Hurr! What is it good for? Approval ratings for national leaders, yeah! War! Hurr! What is it good for? Deflecting attention from complex domestic problems! Say it again!"
Back in 1982, America supported Britain in the Falklands war on condition that the British government signed a special contract drawn up by the Pentagon which stated: "In return for US backing, Britain hereby promises to support every armed intervention that America undertakes for ever and ever."
There can't be any other explanation for this country's consistent enthusiasm for every American bombing raid or new missile deployment. When the White House declared a war on drugs, British jets were scrambled ready to bomb a solitary dope-dealer in downtown Detroit. If the president's daughter reveals her battle with underage drinking, the SAS are sent in to battle with the demon drink on her behalf.
But if we believe we can influence US foreign policy by sticking beside America, we are deluding ourselves. Britain can no more affect the direction being taken than can a teenage girl gripping the seat as her joyriding boyfriend speeds out of control. One day, in the not-too-distant future, Tony Blair will appear in tears opposite George Bush on the Jerry Springer show. "On today's programme, world leaders who promised special relationships." The host will put a reassuring hand on his shoulder as a bitter Tony recounts how much he did for this guy: he went to war for him, he stuck up for him when no one else would, even though his friends warned him not to get too close. Because George promised Tony they would always do everything together.
But then bang! bang! and it was all over. George had got what he wanted and he wasn't bothered about Tony any more. And then the audience will boo George from Texas as he shrugs and sneers, "Hey I get into bed with whoever suits me - who knows what I promised Terry here." Cue the shouting and the undignified scuffle as they cut to the ads and Jerry Springer says, "Coming up after these messages - my brother screwed Florida!"
In the hysteria of the moment, all wars can seem justifiable. During the War of Jenkins' Ear, all the woolly liberals were going around saying, "Well, this Jenkins chap did have his ear chopped off after all, so I think an all-out war against Spain is the only justifiable course of action."
But if the invasion of Iraq is such a great idea, why weren't we lobbying America to pursue this policy before they told us about it when they faxed through the infantry request form. We would all love to see Saddam Hussein overthrown but this has to be brought about by the people of Iraq. There are plenty of appalling regimes around the world and some we arm and some we bomb. In Saddam's case we have done both just to be on the safe side.
If ever Arab support for peace in the Middle East needed to be courted it is now. So what does the American president think? "I know! Why don't we invade Iraq? Because things are so quiet between Israel and the Palestinians at the moment that a US invasion of an Arab state would probably go down really well." I had PE teachers more intelligent than George Bush. Tony Blair has to put some distance between himself and the global village idiot. The Labour party might be able to forgive its leader for behaving like a president, but they could never forgive him for behaving like that president.
So our prime minister should explain to Bush that Britain can only go to war in extreme circumstances and when very precise criteria have been met. "I'm sorry George, but Britain can only bomb or invade a country where the leader has not been democratically elected and where the regime has recently executed British citizens. Oh no, hang on, that's America isn't it? We'd better think this out again." comment at guardian.co.uk