That is what my spouse is saying - and I have to admit that I start seeing her point. Not because of material deprivation, for nobody in the US of A, even people whom you so eloquently describe, suffers from such deprivation in any true sense. It is because of the feeling of the lack or purpose and direction, or existential angst as they used to call it.
You see, we have all our human needs met - even the folks who work the minimum wage jobs earn enough to pay for the basic necessities of life, like food, shelter, and clothing. Perhaps not the nice ones, but adequate. My current spouse, while a single mom with 2 kids and a $28k per year job managed by shopping at Goodwill, augmenting her grocery budget with WiC stamps, and taking advantage of various housing subsidies. I lived off student loans and credit cards and also shopping at Goodwill, since my kid was an urban punk and would not put anything bought at a mall on his butt. Today I live in a coop and my housing expenses are lower than apartment rents, let alone mortgage payments on ridiculously overpriced real property.
The reason I am mentioning it is that everyone in the US can have his or her basic needs met, even if they live on a shoe string budget. I realized that during my visit to a Nairobi slum a couple of years ago. I met people who had decent jobs and still lived in vermin infested structures made of cardboard boxes and sod, with no water, no garbage removal, no electricity, not even paved roads. I have some pics, I can scan and show them to anyone interested. They live like that, because all they income goes for other necessities of life for them and their extended families, including food and health care. The guy who introduced my to the slum (it would be very foolish for a white guy to go there alone) was a university van driver - a good job by Kenyan standards - but much of his income went to pay for the hospital bill for a relative of his, as Kenya does not have a public health care system.
So after handing my brief case and cheap camera to the driver (it was safer that way, I was told) I was cautiously walking in the Nairobi slum alleys, listening to angry women shouting that they were Muslim and did not want people like me in their neighborhood, looking at a collection of jewelery made of pig bones made by a resident (I was given two of those as gifts for myself and my wife, because I was the driver's friend), and gazing at an otherwise non-remarkable brick building which, as it turned out, was a public school and the pride of the slum. Mounds of garbage were everywhere, the stench was unbearable. The landscape was filled with the same vistas for miles, as far as I could see.
Yet despite this unimaginable for a Northerner poverty, the people I met in Africa were anything but hopeless. In fact, Northerners are more angry and depressed about what amounts to aesthetic qualities of life - i.e. not getting what they want - a job that boosts their prestige, a house they desire, a vehicle that intimidates other drivers, clothing that look cool and trendy. The lefties like me and others are not much different, except that they desire different things, such as public transportation, better public schools, environmentally friendly economy, etc.
This gets us the observation that the despair of the people whom you so eloquently describe, and for that matter, most of us on this list, is of an aesthetic nature. It comes from the fundamental trait in the human nature that once we got a taste of something good, we want it and we long for it. However, because of another fundamental trait in the human nature - transaction cost minimizing rather than utility maximizing - people want to have their desires fulfilled on the cheap, with no or little effort on their part (this is what's behind your observation that people expect you to deliver your services for free or for a pittance). In short, they want nice things that the capitalist economy produces, but they do not want to work for them very hard - so they take advantage of any cope out handed to them.
In one of my previous lives, I worked as instructor for the US Army - dealing mainly with college age kids. They joined the Army for the most part to get a college grant and to travel. This was during the 1980s so - the time of relative peace - so their risk of being in the Army was minimal. Of course, they could get a college loan or have their parents help them, or perhaps work and study - but that required more work. Joining the Army was an easy way to get what they wanted, and they did not have pay anything back.
Since desire for good things and transaction cost minimization seem to be universal traits of the human nature, condemning people for exhibiting them i.e. joining the Army is not really warranted. We all sell out in way or another. However, if people who try to get on a cheap and get screwed up in the process, say, if they run a red light and a hit by a truck, join the Army to get their MBA and the war breaks out or for that matter vote for Bush who promises them to make them safe and on the top of the world again but then cuts their pensions and their jobs, why should anyone, let alone leftists, pity them?
I made many mistakes in my life, but trying to get ahead at the expense of someone else was not one of them. In fcat, I was burned many times for trying to avoid that or even help some people. The nadir was lending $200 (half of our monthly living expenses) to a new "student" whose car broke down, I was told, and he needed money to pay for the tow truck. Of course it was a scam, and my ex was furious. When we reported it to the police (I had the guy's name and license number), the cop looked in disbelief and asked "Did not it occur to you that people have other ways of dealing with car emergencies, like using their AAA or credit cards?" It did. In fact, I did smell a rat, but I also though that what if the guy was telling the truth but Iw as stereotyping him based on his skin color (he was black)? What I was in a similar situation and people refused to help because I speak with an accent?
Well, losing $200 and earning the reputation of a sucker was not a very smart thing to do, but there was something I gained out of - being able to refuse to get ahead at the expense of others. So why should I exonerate and pity those who do not? In fact, I am very troubled by people who are willing to kill others in order to get out of rut in their own life.
Wojtek