[lbo-talk] Eye surgery, audiology and used car sales

Gar Lipow gar.lipow at gmail.com
Fri Nov 1 16:30:52 PDT 2013


Attention conservation notice: personal anecdote. Politics and economics to be added by you.

Just got back from eye surgery at Clarus. Clarus also does audiology. And they figured that as long as they had a captive audience in the waiting room for eye surgery, that they would try to sell hearing aids. So here was the audiologist's hard sell pitch. I may have spoiled it a bit by laughing about halfway through it.

1) 50% of people over 53 need hearing aids. Also if you are having serious eye problems there is a good chance that you have hearing problems as well, no matter what your age. So you, yes you probably need a hearing aid.

2) Now it is true that hearing aids are expensive. But studies have shown that people who need hearing aids and don't get them suffer from depression, low self-esteem, social isolation and ... In short, if you need a hearing aid, life is not worth living without one.

3) What if you already have a hearing aid? Well, there has been a revolution in hearing aid manufacturing. So if your hearing aid is more than two years old, it is garbage compared to what is standard today. Note that at this point the audiologist has defined her market as all of the following A) Anyone 53 or over B ) anyone with serious eye problems C) anyone already wearing a hearing aid that is over two years old.

4) But, you may be thinking, the hearing aids this place sells are expensive. Maybe I should get a new hearing aid, but shop elsewhere before buying one here. It turns out that the new revolutionary hearing aids require advanced programming skills that are not included in standard audiologist education. But this audiologist, standing right in front of people in a waiting room waiting for eye surgery, has advanced professional training in programming the new generation of hearing aids. You plain old audiologist down the road can't come close to her mad digital hearing aid adjustment skills. So not only had you better get a new hearing aid if you want your life not to be miserable, you need to get it from this audiologist, or it will never be adjusted right.

So, I have no idea what her real skills are as an audiologist, but she definitely has what it takes to sell used cars. -- Facebook: Gar Lipow Twitter: GarLipow Solving the Climate Crisis web page: SolvingTheClimateCrisis.com Grist Blog: http://grist.org/author/gar-lipow/ Online technical reference: http://www.nohairshirts.com



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